Thursday, November 16, 2006

P.O.V., And The Blogging Pervert




I was looking at my blog the other night, after having just spilled my guts out virtually in front of myself on-screen. Then I thought about tossing it all away and deleting the blog -- again. Yes, I've made attempts at this before, because the writer inside me just won't shut up. But I also don't kid myself. If you take a look around the 'net at what others think of those with sexual preferences or fetishes (though they once meant two very different things), you'll see that, outside of the fetish community itself, there isn't much praise for being different. Of course that's how the world works, and I understand that. I also understand that there must be loads of people who say one thing then do another, because I know that the way I present myself to the outside world at my job, and in everyday situations, you would never think for a second that I might like women with extra curves in certain spots. There must be others out there.

However, here's the thing about any sort of preference surrounding a woman's body that even suggests pregnancy -- traditional thoughts of the pregnant woman never seems to rise above mild interest unless you're talking about the impending father (and that's if the mom-to-be is lucky, sometimes). Now enter me, who sees the curvature of the belly, breasts, and hips (hell, the whole body) as a turn-on, and you've got trouble. Pregnant women are helpless, and should never be looked at in an erotic way -- they've got a job to do. Oh sure, occasionally you will get the woman who says she enjoys being pregnant, being able to eat whatever she wants, having a reason to "get fat"...but ask her again after the baby comes. Time to tone up, for sure, but time to slip back into the mode of downplaying the curves and the weight once more. Pregnancy is never erotic, the body shape is never erotic. Bull.

Searching web pages and blogs, I've noticed two things. One is that, if a woman becomes pregnant, and dares to post pictures of herself while pregnant on her site, that a pregnancy fetishist will find those pictures. He (it always is a he) will then apparently hound the woman for more pictures, or to hit on her incessantly until she needs to pull not only any photos, but the whole site as well.

OK, let me make myself perfectly clear: I hate these guys. I hate them because, even if you get off on a picture of a pregnant belly (and sure, I do), you do what any self-respecting fetishist does -- you take the pictures off the site, and do what you want with them on your own time. You don't harangue the woman into a panic that you're about to show up at her door. Jesus.

The second thing I've found is that, given point number one, there is only one term for someone who finds such a body erotic -- pervert. I have pretty thick skin, but that name is really good at making someone feel even more isolated for having a "different" P.O.V. on one vision of the human female body than they already have labeled themselves.

But you see it everywhere...and the label sucks. I understand that a woman getting harassed by someone who doesn't know the boundaries is a bad thing. But to use the label as a brush to paint anyone that finds the pregnant body attractive downplays the downright lovely way the body looks at this time of her life.

And man, I wish they could see that not every guy is an idiot pervert who doesn't respect boundaries.

Some of us just want to worship you and get off on your eroticism. You know -- that quality you really aren't allowed to feel then.

I learned at an early age that, for me, the curves of the body were everything. I could care less about the baby inside. That's just me. I want to groove to everything about that overripe body type. I don't want kids myself; neither does my wife. Thank goodness. But that doesn't turn off the erotic switch. Go ahead, label me whatever you like. It won't change what I enjoy.

And so, I'm going to blog about it.

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